It isn’t easy to discuss feelings. We’re taught from a young age to disconnect from sadness and anger, to act happy. We don’t know how to identify our own feelings, much less cope with those of another.
The good news is that you and your partner are choosing to connect in this way. Sending your mySysters status is the first step. The second step is identifying and sharing your feelings with each other. We included this same list of feelings (see below) on myGauge. The rest is up to the two of you.
**First, a note about the difference between feelings and emotions. **
Dr. Sarah Mckay, neuroscientist and author of the Your Brain Health blog explains it like this: “Emotions play out in the theater of the body. Feelings play out in the theater of the mind.”
Stated another way, “A feeling is a mental portrayal of what is going on in your body when you have an emotion and is the byproduct of your brain perceiving and assigning meaning to the emotion.” (Debbie Hampton, www.thebestbrainpossible.com/whats-the-difference-between-feelings-and-emotions/)
A PANAS (Positive and Negative Affect Schedule) scale consists of words that describe different feelings. (Different PANAS scales use various words.)
You then rate the extent you feel this way at the present moment OR the extent you felt this way over the past week.
For our purposes, read through the feelings and write down any that of are particular relevance to you lately. Ask your partner to do the same.** If you feel comfortable, text each other your lists. The results will probably surprise both of you.**
Over time it should become easier to identify what you’re feeling.
Active/ Afraid/ Alert/ Alone/ Amazed/ Angry at Self/ Annoyed/ Anxious/ Ashamed/ Astonished/ At Ease/ Attentive/ Bashful/ Bitter/ Blameworthy/ Blue/ Bold/ Bored/ Calm/ Cheerful/ Comfortable/ Concentrating/ Confident/ Confused/ Content/Daring/Delighted/ Depressed/ Determined/ Disdain/ Disgusted with self/ Dissatisfied with self/Distressed/Downhearted/Drowsy/ Eager/ Embarrassed/ Energetic/ Enthusiastic/ Envious/ Excited/Fearless/Foolish/Frightened/ Frustrated/ Furious/ Grieving/ Guilty/ Happy/ Hopeful/ Hostile/ Hurt/ Inadequate/ Insecure/ Inspired/ Interested/ Irritable/ Jealous/ Jittery/ Joyful/Lively/Loathing/ Lonely/ Lost/ Loving/ Miserable/ Motivated/ Nervous/Overwhelmed/ Peaceful/ Proud/Relaxed/ Relieved/ Resentful/Sad/Satisfied/Scared/Scornful/ Self-conscious/Shaky/ Sheepish/Shocked/Shy/ Silly/Sleepy/ Sluggish/ Strong/ Stupid/Surprised/ Suspicious/Tense/ Terrified/Timid/Tired/ Trapped/ Uncomfortable/ Upset/ Worried/Worthless